A husband is the head of his family. It doesn’t matter how old he is or how mature, this is the position the Lord gives him.
Some husbands are ready for this role. Life has molded them into leaders. They have been given opportunities to lead—growing up in their family, at school, at church, at work. Perhaps they have had as many failures as they have successes, but they have had experience.
Stepping into a leadership role once married may be a thrill or it may be awkward—but it isn’t their first rodeo.
Other men perhaps have shied away from leading. It may not be because they are “bad” at it, but perhaps they have just preferred to stay “under the radar.” It’s entirely possible that men who have natural leading skills have simply been too shy, humble, or even busy to take on leadership abilities.
A Teachable Heart
A man has a lot of pressure on him to raise a family. Sometimes the pressure is from his kids, his wife, society, or even himself.
William Petersen once said that a smart man is not a man who knows all the answers. A smart man is one who knows where to find the answers. And this is also what our men need. They don’t need to know it all. They need to know where to go to get their answers.
Once they’ve sought the Lord’s guidance, problems aren’t going to go away on their own. Our men must have hearts that can humbly and honestly receive these answers. Their hearts must be teachable.
Guidance is going to come from their bibles, their quiet time, and also from other godly men and women in their lives. Their eyes and ears must be open for answers and their hearts must be ready to receive, digest, and implement.
Praying For His Heart
There are many reasons a man’s heart may not be moldable:
Perhaps he doesn’t recognize a situation that will need intervention.
Perhaps once he sees a change is needed, he doesn’t seek guidance. Maybe it doesn’t dawn on him to ask. Maybe his pride just gets in the way. Maybe he’s confident that he can find a solution himself.
Maybe he seeks a solution, but doesn’t receive the guidance. It is possible that God answers his prayers right away, but it’s not the advice he’s seeking, or he isn’t sure he’s understanding his answer.
And lastly, perhaps he convinces himself that he is listening to God’s advice. It’s possible he thinks he’s doing “enough” when God’s asking him to do “more.”
Are you single? Pray your future husband is getting plenty of opportunities in his life to humble his heart to seek the Lord’s guidance. Pray that as he is free of the distraction from marriage and family that he be able to discern whom he should and shouldn’t seek guidance from.
Are you engaged? Pray that your soon-to-be groom is using his betrothal time wisely to consider things that are right and things that are wrong in his present life. Pray his heart is open to teaching during this time and that he may be able to let loose of anything in his life right now that is toxic before it enters into your marriage as well.
Are you married? You probably have a good idea of where your husband goes to seek guidance (or if he does). Take a moment when you are by yourself to take notes. Pray first, and then sit down with a pen and paper and list the influences in his life. Make sure to list the good and the bad. Pray over the entire list, one by one.
Pray that your husband would be afforded opportunities to seek godly learning when he has a low stress load so that it will be habit when his situation does become difficult.
Pray that your husband’s eyes and ears would be open to receive godly instruction when it is presented to him.
Pray for protection from lies and the discernment to know when advice and opportunities are ear-tickling or communication from the Almighty.
Pray that your husband would be in the Word regularly and often.
Pray that your husband would make regular habit of praying over all of his decisions on a regular basis, no matter how small.
Pray that your husband would have the faith and courage to follow through with the decisions he and the Lord have made together.
If you’ve never prayed for your husband in an intentional way, I’d encourage you to set a timer every day for a time when you won’t be distracted (perhaps while you get ready in the morning? or are brushing your teeth?) and just pray over these things.
If you are in the habit of being deliberate in your prayer for your man, then I’d encourage you to pick a verse each week, or one for the month to pray over him. It can get to be a bit much if you are picking a different one each day.
- Seeking education: 1 Peter 5:5, Proverbs 12:1, Psalms 1:1
- Receiving instruction: Proverbs 13:18, Romans 10:17, Titus 2:1, Acts 17:11
- Discernment: 1 Corinthians 2:13-14
- Implementing: Hosea 4:6, 2 Timothy 2:15
I’d like to go first:
Poverty and disgrace come to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is honored. Proverbs 13:18
Father in heaven, I pray that my husband would be ever conscious of the instruction you provide to him directly or indirectly, that poverty and disgrace would not come to him. I pray Lord that you would keep his eyes open to see your revelations, and his ears open to hear your instruction.
May he recognize and heed the reproof that you provide to the sons you love. Father find favor in my husband and bring him honor as he bends to your ways.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Your turn Friends. Get together with God and intercede for your man that he would be built up to be a strong, courageous and wise leader for your family.
Did you pick another verse? Please feel free to share your verse with us in the comments. And if you are just joining us, be sure to check out the beginning of our adventures to pray for our husbands here. God bless you Friends. I’ll see you next month.