Preparing For Your Husband

Posted on Posted in Marriage, Singleness

Are you preparing for your husband ladies?  If you aren’t romantically involved, are you preparing to be?  If you are betrothed, are you making preparations to be married?  If you are already married, are you still preparing every day for your husband?

Have you given it much thought?  All of us need to be preparing.


Not ready for a husband?

If you are at a place in your life where you feel you aren’t ready for a husband (perhaps you have become single for whatever reason, or maybe you’re only 16?); or maybe, like me, you’ve decided you’re never going to get married–then perhaps you haven’t given this a second thought.

I remember being 14 in Sunday school, when we were encouraged to pray for our future husband.  I remember, because I had no intentions of ever becoming married.  It was always an awkward time for me.  Inwardly, my prayers went a little something like this,  “Lord, I feel awful for any fool who looks upon me with interest.  Please steer him elsewhere so he doesn’t get hurt.”

Yeah.  Seriously.



Perhaps, you are at an exciting place in your life where you have picked out your mate.  You are planning the wedding.  You may be attending premarital counseling.  Or… you may figure if you know your soon-to-be well enough to become engaged, then you are past needing any counseling.  Perhaps you feel if God has placed you in this situation then He feels you are ready.

I remember becoming newly engaged.  I didn’t attend premarital counseling because my fiance felt that since he gave premarital counseling on a regular basis, he already knew what we would need to know to get us through.  He felt the only other part was the intimacy issue.  We were courting, and saving everything.  So his thought was that there was no need for any counseling.

Let me tell you friends, it was the fairy tale every little girl dreamed about.  But because I made foolish decisions and listened to the word of man instead of the Word of God–it ended two weeks before our wedding–before it even started it was over.  It was a horribly painful and growing time for me.  Not preparing can be costly and devastating…


Blissfully Married

Next comes the ladies who are married.  And marriage is all the bliss and reward we have dreamed about–almost.  Sadly, this may be the category of women who are least likely to be actively preparing.

If you are married, are you preparing for your husband on a regular basis?  What can you possibly be doing to prepare for marriage when you are already married?  Good question.


What does God say about preparing for marriage?

Oh so much!  The passage I will pull out for now is Matthew 25:1-13

25 Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.  And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.  They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them:  But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.  While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept.  And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.  Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps.  And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your oil; for our lamps are gone out.  But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves.  10 And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut.  11 Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us.  12 But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not.  13 Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.

Wow.  The Word of God has powerful words for us.

Let us first look at who the passage is about.  Virgins.  Women who have kept their virtue.  These are not the prostitutes and careless women who are busy enjoying their flesh.  These are virtuous women.

Next let us look at the situation they have found themselves in.  All of them had lamps.  They were given the correct tool they needed to get them through the situation.  So what was the difference?

The passage clearly says that five were fools, and five were wise.  What is the price to be paid?

They slumber while they wait.  And then a cry announcing the Bridegroom’s presence awakens them.  He is here–there is no time to prepare.  The foolish women have no time to prepare so they desperately want to take some of the preparation from the wise virgins.

The wise virgins are unable to help, but leave good advice to the foolish.  Only now are the foolish women preparing.  But it is too late.  The Bridegroom tells those who had not made advance spiritual preparations, “I do not know you.”  Ouch.

Did these women know their Bridegroom their would come at night?  I don’t know.  But they were prepared for it.


When we are single and believe there is no husband out there for us, and when we therefore do not prepare–we are foolish even if virtuous.  I have personal testament to this.  I believed there was no husband out there for me and was caught foolishly off-guard when a courtship fell into my lap.  And it ended in disaster.

If we believe there is no Bridegroom out there, then when He is at the door–as He will be one day— we will not be ready.  And it will end in disaster for us.  We will not be able to look upon those who have made preparation for last minute help.


On the other hand, some of us are awaiting our wedding day.  What would happen if you didn’t have a dress?  Rings?  What if you forgot to send out invitations?  What if you skip the premarital counseling?  What if you decide to become intimate since you’re going to get married anyway–but don’t have birth control?  Worse–what if you got pregnant, and then your groom died?

The virgins in the story knew their Bridegroom was coming.  They were betrothed and even excited.  But they didn’t prepare adequately.  They thought a lamp was okay, but they could skip the extra oil.  Do we make sure to have the perfect vows, but skip the planning necessary to keep those vows running smoothly?  God’s words says these women were fools.

I was one of them.  I was a fool.  And it ended in disaster.


Now that I am married, I have learned to prepare–regularly.  If that doesn’t make sense, ask yourself, “Was I ready to be a wife a day after I was married?  A week after?”  Or, did you have to constantly learn, grow and work at it?  I’m still working on it.  I’m still growing.  And I have so much to learn still.

That’s a lot of information, isn’t it?  Stay with me for the month of October.  I’ll share with you how you can prepare for your husband

And then we’ll end with how to prepare for your Bridegroom, no matter who you are.

Even if you’ve been through this and are actively preparing–actually especially if you’ve been through this–please join us.  We all need some Titus 2 women speaking into our lives, and I want you to join our conversations.

Let’s learn from God’s Word and strengthen our marriages.

Preparing for our husbands. When we're single, when we don't want a husband, when we're engaged, when we're married. And afterwards...


Were you blessed by this series?  I pray you were.  If you’d like to continue with us, please join us in our year-long journey of praying for our husbands.  I’ll see you there.


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